I guess you could say I’m a bit of a worrier.
I think you can probably relate to one extent or another but let me explain where I’m going with this. While on a trail run yesterday we veered off course and decided to jump across some rocks that ran through a small-ish river to get to the opposite bank. I hesitated when I got to one rock because it seemed just a bit too far away for me to jump to. With that being said you’d have thought the water would have swallowed me whole if I were to fall in. I kept saying out loud, “I can’t reach that! It’s too far!”. After about thirty seconds of hesitating and looking around for other visibly safer options I realized how silly I sounded, so I jumped. Of course I landed it and of course I said to myself, “Oh, I guess it really wasn’t that far after all.” Though in many cases just before “jumping” in life, when the reality sets in so do the consequences and I begin to think, “OH MY GOD THIS COULD GO SERIOUSLY WRONG ON SO MANY LEVELS!” It’s funny though how we tend to doubt our abilities just because we think we aren’t strong enough, fast enough, smart enough or even deserving enough.
With that being said, here’s the kicker…I recently competed in my first Spartan obstacle course race. (Let the “She did what!?” sink in a minute).
Back tracking a bit, for those of you who don’t know me, I was never an athletic kid growing up. I was shy, kept to myself, always felt awkward in social settings and thus never wanted to be in the spotlight keeping me from taking part in things like sports or group activities. In turn, lacking confidence in myself left me with a sense of “I could never be good enough to do that.” sort of feeling and it’s an awful way to think, plain and simple. Doubting yourself and feeling like you’re not good enough is no way for ANY kid or adult to feel.
Jumping forward though to the present I can proudly say I’ve overcome most of my insecurities. As an adult I can admittedly share that I’ve experienced a lot which has led me to become not only a stronger person but one that truly believes in herself. I struggle with various things still, don’t get me wrong (such as jumping rocks), but having come to the realization that I am just as capable as anyone else is truly a wonderful feeling. Being able to challenge myself, and knowing that it’s not about anyone else but me, has helped me to take that leap minus the hesitation more often than not.
I never in a million years thought I’d be able to complete an obstacle course race. I assumed I’d win the lottery before that would happen (which in all seriousness I would have taken the lottery). I mean the idea of running, climbing, swinging, hanging, swimming, carrying, lifting, being covered in mud (and in this particular race cow poop…don’t ask) and not being able to throw in the towel (though I could have used about 20) is terrifying! Oh and the burpees, no, no, no don’t forget the burpees! I literally spent the time between signing up and race day wondering who I thought I was thinking I could actually complete this. How was I supposed to hoist my body over walls I could barely reach the top of even by jumping? How was I supposed to shimmy my way up a borderline too high of a rope while covered in slippery mud to tap the bell without falling off? How was I supposed to carry a bucket of gravel that weighs between 70-100lbs a quarter of a mile? Not to mention the obvious, doing all of these things next to competitors that actually know what they are doing, unlike me. I was seriously contemplating moving to another country and changing my name or even just calling in sick that day.
But I think somewhere nestled in my gut I knew I didn’t need to.
During the week leading up to the event I slowly began to notice I was acting partially crazy. Sure I was being semi realistic that I might struggle along the way, I’m only human, but I had been training, A LOT. The months leading up to the race I ran trails, sprinted up hills, practiced at facilities for this very type of race, worked out constantly and I also wasn’t going to be running this alone. Knowing I was not only physically preparing myself but that I could count on my brother to assist me along the way during the race was just enough encouragement for me to not back down. I knew I couldn’t quit. I had sat on the sidelines long enough to not cross this finish line and prove to myself that I COULD do this just because I simply wanted to. To be able to reassure myself that I’d be able to jump into this race, just like in life, feet landing on the next rock without worry and doubt is really what I needed. I needed this for me.
And so I did it. And I did it well.
Let me tell you, it was one of the best feelings to cross that finish line. I think I turned to my brother as soon as we ran through the archway and said, “Holy crap, (though I may have used more vulgar language) I can’t believe I finished it!”. The doubt that we plant inside our heads is what ultimately holds us back from taking that jump. We worry too much of failure, rejection, or disappointment of not meeting our own expectations that it often seems easier to just not do it. We are our own worst enemies. If you let go of focusing on your fears you may just see how capable you really are. It’s all in our minds what we think we can not do. Truthfully, what may seem scary initially isn’t usually that scary after all. Let the belief in yourself be what overpowers that very fear and becomes what encourages you to smile and say, “I can do this.”
(And you’ll be happy to know I’m already training for my next race.)
This pizza makes the perfect breakfast or brunch. It’s packed with flavor, looks super fancy but requires minimal prep and bakes up within 20 minutes! Not to mention if you can refrain from eating it all it does make great leftovers, too!
Asparagus and Goat Cheese Skillet Breakfast Pizza
Serves: 3/Prep time: 5 minutes/Bake time: 20 minutes
- 1 package of Julian Bakery Paleo Pizza Crust (purchase here)
- 1/2 c water
- pinch of sea salt
- 3 eggs
- bunch of asparagus (about 6-8 spears), pre-cooked but left whole
- 1/4 c goat cheese crumbles
- 1/2 tsp fresh oregano, chopped
- sea sea salt and pepper to taste
- Preheat oven to 425F and spray or lightly oil your skillet and set aside.
- In a medium sized bowl combine the Pizza Crust mix, 1/2 c of water and pinch of salt. Mix until you can form a ball of dough.
- Divide the dough in two (this recipe only requires half of the package so refrigerate or freeze the remaining dough for later use).
- Lay out the dough ball in between two pieces of parchment paper and roll out to fit the size of your skillet.
- Gently lay the flattened dough in the pan and press or trim if needed to adjust the size to fit properly.
- Curl up the edges of the dough to form a small wall to hold in the eggs.
- Pierce the dough with a fork a few times to aerate.
- Place skillet in the oven and cook for about 10 minutes or until crust is lightly golden.
- Remove the skillet from the oven and carefully crack the eggs onto the crust.
- Reduce the oven temperature to 375F and place skillet back in oven and cook for about 8 minutes. Then remove and top with asparagus spears and goat cheese. Bake for additional 3 minutes until eggs are set.
- Top with fresh oregano, sea salt and pepper and allow to cool slightly before slicing.